2017 Focus: myself

I hope that you ended the previous year surrounded by loved ones and started the new with a smile on your face as I did. Also I am grateful to be alive and well surrounded.

I am picking up where I left of on this beginning of 2017. It isn’t a new me that is writing this piece just the same woman striving to become a better version of herself every day. So instead of resolutions, I choose to make promises to myself. I briefly mentioned them in my last post. Here’s my list:

• Continue to show more empathy, compassion and be a true active listener. I mean by being a true active listener: paying more attention to non verbal language, to read between the lines; and to know when to give my peace or not. I need to know when to just show up to provide a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, a silly partner and so on.

• Pay the attention to the vibe. In conjunction with the first one, to know when to quietly retreat and focus on different things, people. It helps in dealing with change and in adapting to different situations.

• Discreetly and steadily work on my career plans and projects. I started listing my ideas but I need to make a detailed triennial plan for example.
• Put more efforts on my own grind: Many people told me that all the efforts that I put in supporting and pushing others, I should start putting on myself. Perhaps, there is something comforting behind the scenes but growth does not come out of comfort. So I shall be bolder in 2017. It’s about timing as well.

• Nurture my mind, body and soul: I have many great books pilling up on my desk and on my night table. Read more! Dance classes and solo runs are calling my name, as well as yoga and meditation sessions. My journals are either empty or filled with unfinished writings. My paint brushes and palettes are staring at me while I’m writing this post. Writing and painting were always my escapes of choice.
• Staying true to myself: No need to downsize my positivity, to shrink my caring bones to satisfy with others inability to leave bitterness, pettiness and sourness behind. I promise myself that I shall not respond to negativity by lowering my standards.  Michelle Obama brilliantly said «When they go low, we go high». I shall stay high by knowing when to take a deep breath (or knock into a punching bag loool) and ignore or to take a step back and show even more kindness and compassion.

• Be more tactful: I’m slowly and surely getting there. Many of you might not agree with me but I do feel that there’s a time to speak and another to let things go. Again, a question of timing.

 

• Stopped being influenced by others actions: yes, we live in society; yes we are not alone on Earth. I just feel that I need in conjunction with #6 &7,  to stop allowing actions make by others to drive me to do or say things that I’d never imagined doing or saying to other human beings.

• Dare to be and Iike Mlle Geri would say  » dare to wear »: embrace my specificity, my uniqueness inside out more and let it show in my actions and in what I wear.

• Bring my blog and personal branding to another level. In alignment with #4, 2017 I’m coming for you!

  

I hesitated between 10 promises and 12 (for each month) but I opted for 10. For starters, it is more realistic and manageable. In addition, I always do a midyear assessment of my goals and see what readjustments need to be made for my birthday and a final evaluation on the last month of the year.

So remember to follow your intuition, your dreams and to sprinkle love all around! Stay flawsome!

Marie-Christine Jeanty, January 2nd, 2017

A great inspirational blog to follow: Me Unfinished 

Great New Years resolutions for Montrealers by Toula Drimonis

 

I am 32…

 

I am 32, perfectly imperfect. I am a work in progress and proud of who I am and of what I have accomplished so far. I will keep working hard to become a better version of myself every day. I am running my own race alongside other people striving to achieve. I have learned to enjoy the journey and that happiness isn’t a destination. I am grateful for the people I am blessed to have as parents, family members and as friends. I thank them for their unconditional love and ongoing support. I am sensitive and strong at the same time. I am in touch with my emotions but I don’t let them control me (most of the time at least!). I am a social bird but I don’t enjoy the spotlight…I am perfectly imperfect!‪

• I will (almost) always be amazed by people’s actions and motivations;
• I can confirm that it is important to refresh and review your circle friendships evolve and people go in different directions. Will our paths cross again? Time will tell
• I find that Loyalty, honesty, empathy and reciprocity are important components in friendships
• I knew but apparently needed to reminded that not everyone is meant to be my friend, or my acquaintance and that is alright; But that doesn’t mean we cannot coexist in the same circles.
• I am learning to try and always keep an open mind and my door open;
• I stopped apologizing for my feelings even if I might be wrong; and I am working on expressing them with more clarity and calmness;
• I try to communicate more, to ask questions: and not simply assume things;
• I have been face with the facts that not everyone will understand me, that not everyone wants to understand me and that is alright;
• I am adjusting and working hard to get out of my comfort zone; to embrace change and ultimately grow without losing my essence;
• I’ve realized that when people lie that it says more about them than about myself : they aren’t ready to face my reaction  Those lies(often by omission) affected my friendship with these people more than anything that they would had to say;
• The people around me that claimed to be honest were the ones most afraid of the truth;
• Tactfulness does not equal hypocrisy;
• Nothing is eternal especially not jobs or friendships;
• Not everyone has a big heart as mine but I refuse to let bitterness invade my heart;
• I will not burn bridges;
• Almost everything is about timing and synchronicity;
• In my point of view  relationships aren’t about the perfect timing because their isn’t such a thing;
• I believe that relationships are about 2 people building each other up, growing together not 2 people building a career, following their dream in parallel and hoping that one day they become perpendicular;
• I love sharing with people; I love creating links between people
• I am falling in love with myself a little more every day
• I accept that perfection is not found on earth but I will do my best to be a better version of myself every day
• Advice, an opinion and/or constructive feedback are just that; take it or leave it; no need for drama;
• It is essential to be surrounded by dreamers, people with vision boards and not afraid to work hard to achieve;
• Some people have and will always try to bring me down but I refuse to follow their lead and I choose to rise above;
• I eat well and try to exercise more not because I hate my body but because I love it so much;
• It isn’t about fitting in a bikini (I don’t even like them) but it is about feeling more comfortable in my own skin;

photo credit : Anaëlle aka NanaMoon

Pic taken at En Cachette

September is gone like dirt off my shoulders!

 

In order to move up to bigger and better things on must, I insist must learn to let go. It is a painful process for many (like me) but it is necessary.

Nothing good is accomplished by holding on to broken dreams, to hope for a different ending to a chapter that ended lifetimes ago. Move on, open your heart, open your senses to everything that life has in store for you.

So after months of stalling, over thinking, overplanning and I confess revisiting the past; I’m not sure how it happen exactly but one morning I woke up and decided to clean up my life some more!

I’m lying, i know exactly what happened; after trying to delay the inevitable (by all types of tactics) one conversation sparked so much anger and negativity into me that I decided that I could not live like this anymore. I  started off one particular chapter of my romantic life’s history book and transformed itself into a way to channel all my anger from various chapters of that same book. The piece took a life of its own and I felt liberated and my shoulders lighter, much lighter.

So the morning after I took my laptop and cellphone and started unfriending and deleting folks away… Also I have been distancing myself from others. I can breathe so much better now.  At soe point in your life, you have to face the fact that not everyone you thought was a friend or a supportive acquaintance is what they claim to be. Bitter people try to bring you down with them in their misery; it is up to you to allow it to continue or to shut the door in their faces.

There’s only so much you can do about what has already been done.  Those are the things I think you can and should do (in my humble opinion and speaking from experience) : clean up your entourage, virtually and physically; stop blaming yourself and make a list of things you learned from this experience; forgive those people and if you believe in God like me pray for them (if not just hope they find a way out of their struggles) because usually people who hurt others are struggling.

Last but not least on the list: nurture yourself and your fabulousness (yeah made up a word) both inner and outer body need nurturing and TLC  : body, mind and soul agreement!!

So while you are gearing up for fall and eventually winter; get rid of old baggage.

That is why I did in September, dirt off my shoulders pouff!

Marie-Christine Jeanty

 

My truth

I’m falling for you. Every day that passes by I’m taken over by feelings beyond my control. I did not set out to be lost in thoughts of you and to miss you every second that you are away from me. This was supposed to be a temporary fill in, you were suppose to be the transition guy. You were not supposed to be the one I want to run to when something is wrong. You were suppose to be  the one I want to call when something is right. My imagination keeps bringing me places with you and I get lost in thoughts of us.

My mind is torned. It wants to accept my heart’s decision to welcome you  and my body’s desire. My mind  questions your true intentions with my heart and wonders if you’re only after what my body has to offer you. My mind wonders why my heart beats so fast when I receive a text message from you or simply hear the sound of your voice. My mind wonders why only emoticons and not actions? My mind  does not understand why my heart makes excuses for your hmm  long silences.

My heart wants to tell my mind to  stay quiet.My heart is tempted to shut down my intuitions.  At the same time my heart is barely in recovery. It still has invisible scars from the last time it took over my mind. As far as my body, with no doubt it is begging for you. It aches for you.

We met, my feelings grew. The distance did not magically disappear. I doubted you then. Things happened. I acted without thinking and was filled with guilt. Now you are doubting me. Every once in a while, when I least expect it, you throw it back in my face.  Didn’t you get even the next evening, in the most cruel way? Now our long conversations are replaced by long hmm silences and emoticons. The dialogue feels more like a long monologue.

The worst part is that you refuse to accept that I’m falling for you. Your heart is locked with all the pain you endured in the past. Your mind is filled with assumptions and preconceived ideas about me having other options. I know I’m a pretty girl with a pretty smile and a real brain.

When are you going to accept that you are my only option at this point even if it was not supposed to me this way. You were suppose to be a temporary fill in, the transition guy.

When will you finally let your mind unlock your heart and accept MY TRUTH?

©Marie-Christine Jeanty 2011